You know when you’re being grumpy, as in you’re being a total miserable mare but you just can’t seem to stop? Yeah? No? Just me then.
Most of the time I’m a cheery person who’s fun to be around. Occasionally though I become possessed by a combination of an officious traffic warden and a depressed bear. In my defence I have Cylothymia and as such am prone to mood swings. This weekend saw one such swing that wasn’t fun and is pretty embarrassing to admit. So obviously I’m going to blog about it because embarrassment needs an audience, right? Ok, again, obviously just me.
So it was Saturday and I had my usual schedule of ferrying Super Kid to football and ballet class, that’s two separate classes by the way not some hippy hybrid. In between we have a friend and her kids round for lunch. I’m on a pretty tight schedule, so naturally I sit around doing nothing and then rush to make lunch for eight at the last minute. I open the fridge and out jumps a large pot of yoghurt, seriously jumped right out definitely not me putting it in badly in the first place. So yeah, yoghurt all over the floor with ten mins to make lunch for eight in order to get out in time for ballet class.
So I do what any self respecting idiot would do and yell at my husband. Obviously the yoghurt and the lateness of lunch is in some way his fault, and I’m determined to point this out. Poor man starts cleaning up yoghurt and doesn’t say a word, he’s a good man and yes I’m going to hang onto him.
I make lunch, all the while grumbling away like some cantankerous old man bemoaning the state of the world today. My friend and my husband ignore me, probably a wise move. We eat and I try to snap out of it.
So ballet class is attended and as planned the Purple family walk into the city to visit the harbour festival which was on last weekend. The harbour festival is a really cool free festival with music, circus, dance, oh yeah and boats obviously.
We walk into the city which takes the best part of an hour with toilet and whinge stops. We make our way through the crowds to the circus stage. The grass I’d imagined us sitting on is basically dust, I see some dog poo on the floor nearby, and the whole bohemian sitting on the grass watching circus in a field image is totally destroyed. I try really really hard to be the cool, calm Mum who takes this in her stride and pulls it together with some fun new plan, I really do. Instead I’m tired, was already in a bit of a bad mood and shout at my husband some more. Poor guy really does deserve a medal, but by this point is showing signs of patience wearing thin.
Next my day gets even better when the skies open and the rain starts pouring down on us. It’s obviously set in for a while and we leg it to a nearby shopping centre for cover. Now at this point I just want to give up on a bad day and go home but rather than tell my husband this I agree to take the children for some dinner out. It gets better when I suggest Nandos for some dirty food and he agrees. I mostly eat organic, wholesome food but occasionally a dirty Nandos burger hits the spot.
We head for Nandos and I am literally salivating in anticipation of my dirty burger. I’m enjoying my burger foreplay when I see the queue. We are told the wait is 20 minutes and I see my burger dreams dissolve in front of me as we head to a nearby pizza place. It gets worse when the pizza place does not have pineapple, as pizza without pineapple is fundamentally wrong, everyone knows this right?
So (drum roll) this is when I become an absolute tit. I’m not proud, in fact I’m slightly mortified by this but I declare that since I can’t have burger or pineapple pizza I will order for the kids and eat nothing myself. Drama queen, me? Anyway husband has had enough of this ridiculous and frankly childish behaviour and leaves me to it in order to calm down. So I sit in this restaurant, feed my kids, try to adapt a jovial gosh kids isn’t this all an adventure attitude and pull myself the heck together!
Finally I end the day the only way you can in these circumstances. I buy a dozen doughnuts and we head home for a doughnut and old episodes of Dr Who fest.